An Attitude of Gratitude for 2009
January 5, 2009
by Monica M. Deer
I was given the opportunity some time ago to speak to a group of women about having an attitude of gratitude (hence the title of this article). As I started to prepare, I started by asking myself one basic question…What does it mean to be grateful? Gratitude is defined in Wikipedia as “the substance of a heart ready to show appreciation, or thankfulness.” It is not simply an emotion, which involves a pleasant feeling that we get when we receive a favor or benefit from someone else but it’s the combination of a state of being and an emotion. Although gratitude is something that anyone can experience, some people seem to feel grateful more often than others. People who tend to experience gratitude more frequently also tend to be happier, more helpful and forgiving, and less depressed than people who are less grateful.
Ask yourself what am I thankful for? It’s easy to be thankful when things are going well. No one has a problem being thankful when they are on top of the world, but what is your attitude when things aren’t going very well? Paul writes in Philippians 4:12 – “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. In whatever state you find yourself be ye content.” What does it mean to have Contentment? Contentment is finding “happiness with one’s situation in life” – no matter what the situation! Now I don’t know about you but I don’t always feel like being “happy” about the things that are going on in my life. When I have company coming to visit, have my meal menu planned and all of a sudden my stove goes on the fritz, I don’t really feel like being happy…or when I’ve had a relaxing vacation, we’re driving home and all of a sudden my 2 year old and 3 month old both start throwing up (in the car – 400 miles from home), that’s not really a call for celebration…or when I’m standing in the hospital, looking down at my newborn baby, tubes going every direction, not being able to breath independently, having to lie in an incubator with no physical touch from the outside world – well, that’s not really a joyous occasion in my opinion.
But, being thankful enables us to overcome our problems instead of being overcome by them. It allows us to look at the situation and not be overtaken by fear and hopelessness, but to know that something (or someONE greater is at work). I heard Oprah Winfrey make a statement about being grateful and it stuck with me. She said, “When you dwell on all the reasons you have to be grateful, you open yourself to receiving even more good – and more good comes to you. As you begin to feel abundant, you’ll be willing and able to pass positive things on to others.” Although I don’t agree with what Oprah says most of the time, I think Biblically speaking we call that philosophy reaping what you sow. If we choose to dwell on what bad things are going on, then we only feel and experience the negative aspects of that situation. We cannot experience fear and gratitude at the same time. We cannot feel anger and gratitude in the same moment. And we cannot possibly feel resentment or jealousy when we view the situation from a place of gratitude.
Recently, I asked several of my friends to email me what came to their mind when they thought of Gratitude. My roommate in college, Stephanie, who lost her father to brain cancer told me this about gratitude. “When my dad was diagnosed with cancer, we all asked why us, why do we have to go through this horrible time? But my dad said to all of us, why not us, what makes us better than any one else. God knows us intimately and would not allow us to face this unless we could do it and we are going to go through it together. That was so comforting even after he died. We still go through it together as a family because why not us.”
Many times the “why me” attitude blocks our attitude of gratitude. When we face a situation that is hard to deal with or that we don’t understand, instead of looking at it from a place of contentment we often face those situations with despair. Now I’m not saying we have to be “happy” in every situation. We don’t even have to like them…but the scripture tells us to be CONTENT. Being content means knowing who is in control and who knows what is best for us – even when we don’t. It’s having an attitude of gratitude for the blessings that God gives us even when we can’t see those blessings for mess that is in front of us.
I received an email several years ago and I never forgot the implications of this simple prayer of thanksgiving. Maybe you can look at it and see that it’s in our attitude of being grateful for what we have that helps us find that place of contentment and thankfulness – no matter what the situation:
Thankful Prayer
Lord, thank you for this sink of dirty dishes; we have plenty of food to eat.
Thank you for this pile of dirty, stinky laundry; we have plenty of nice clothes to wear.
And I would like to thank you, Lord, for those unmade beds; they were so warm and comfortable last night. I know that many have no bed.
My thanks to you, Lord, for this bathroom, complete with all the splattered mirrors, soggy, grimy towels and dirty lavatory; they are so convenient.
Thank you for this finger-smudged refrigerator that needs defrosting so badly; it has served us faithfully for many years. It is full of cold drinks and enough leftovers for two or three meals.
Thank you, Lord, for this oven that absolutely must be cleaned today. It has baked so many things over the years.
The whole family is grateful for that tall grass that needs mowing, the lawn that needs raking; we all enjoy the yard.
Thank you, Lord, even for that slamming screen door. My kids are healthy and able to run and play.
Lord, the presence of all these chores awaiting me says You have richly blessed my family. I shall do them cheerfully and I shall do them gratefully.
Amen
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