Overcoming fear and rejection
July 15, 2009
by Christie Mullins
I responded to God when I was just 8 years old after watching a series of movies at my church about the rapture. I was terrified that I would be left behind when Jesus returned. Even after I got saved there were many times that I thought I had been left. If I was alone in my house for a few minutes, I feared that the rapture had already taken place and my family was gone. As I entered my teens, I guess my fear of not fitting in became greater than my fear of God. I let bad influences into my life and experienced a crushing rejection by my closest friends. I lost sight of who God created me to be and made choices that left me feeling worthless and alone.
However, at the age of 16, I responded to God’s love and salvation. I began reading His Word, and He graciously placed good friends and influences in my life. Unfortunately, I was still haunted by fear and rejection. I often questioned how God could love me and if He was willing to continue to forgive me when I sinned! As I look back I can see crucial points in my life where bad choices led me away from God and His plan for me. However, I can also see His loving pursuit of me throughout my life!
At pivotal points when I have called out to Him, He has responded with love and acceptance. One such point was just a few months ago when my husband and I started attending Church Alive. Again I was feeling fearful and alone. As the church sang, “I am a friend of God” I began to pour my heart out to God and tell Him that I wanted to be His friend! Abruptly the song stopped and a man said there was someone in the congregation who was anxious, fearful and alone. The man said he saw Jesus pushing His way through a large crowd to get to this person and throw His arms around them. I was that person! I felt such a strong presence of God—the tender and relentless pursuit of the One who chose me before the creation of the world. God’s love continues to amaze me and drive out my fear (1 John 4:18).
Through the Believing God Bible study and the reading of Romans 4, I am overcoming feelings of rejection and understanding God’s acceptance of me through Christ. I serve the God who justifies the wicked. I serve the God who credits faith as righteousness (Romans 4:5). I serve the God who will never count my sin against me (Romans 4:8). And I serve the God who gives life to the dead and calls things that are not as though they were (Romans 4:17). I was wicked, but God calls me righteous and He accepts me simply because I am believing Him.
Comments
Got something to say?
You must be logged in to post a comment.