Promises, Premonitions and Preparations
by Nora Neal-Dagett
I was rummaging through a small drawer looking for some batteries when my fingers fell upon a stack of old cards. The cards were from family members and friends the words touched my heart as I read each one. At the bottom of the stack, there was a card from my husband. Like so many of the cards he had given me over the years it was beautiful. The words were written in script on a pastel blue and yellow paper. Because you have become such an important part of my life, I just had to let you know how much you really mean to me. Then he signed it, thanks for loving me, I will always love you! And that was a promise he kept. He loved me until the day God called him home.
I sat there for a moment and allowed all the warm memories to flood my mind. I remembered the Christmas before he died - we were laughing and talking - then out of the blue he said “Honey, I don’t think I’m going to live much longer”. Immediately, I said “Don’t say what you don’t want to happen”. He calmly replied “I’m just telling you how I feel, Sweetie, the Daggett men don’t live to be very old”. His premonition was true he died eight months later.
On the last Sunday in October of this year I was standing in our church at the prayer alter holding my mothers hand. Clearly, I heard the Holy Spirit whisper “she will not be here with you next Sunday”. Tears immediately welled in my eyes. Then I was distracted because Mom began to cough and I tried to assist her as best I could. On Wednesday of that week Mom suffered a stroke. In my mind the whisper from the Holy Spirit was preparation for me that my life and the life of my mom was about to change.
Promises, premonitions and preparation flow from God to us on a daily basis if we are quiet enough to hear them. They may occur during time of meditation and prayer or when you are driving or doing dishes or running the sweeper, or mopping. It is that still, small voice that guides and directs the inner woman. The secret is not to be fearful when you hear it and most importantly not disregard it - but quickly say. “Speak Lord, your servant is listening”.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, I feel privileged and blessed to be in the presence of the presence! To hear your voice through the Holy Spirit speak quietly to me and prepare me for the next step. Help me Lord to always listen and always respond to that which you instruct me to do.
Scripture: John 14:15, 16, 17;” If you love me you will obey what I command. And I will ask the Father and He will give you another Counselor to be with you forever - the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him for he lives with you and will be with you”.
Tis the Season
by Susan Lucas
It’s that time of year again. People are already rushing around, toys are out of stock and the pace of our lives gets more hectic. Seems like we either love the hustle and bustle or would rather do without all the fuss. Since my mom passed away on a Christmas morning and my sister in January, I am always filled with memories and longing. I would gladly give everything I own just to spend an hour with them. The frantic pace only accentuates the sadness.I always have to get my focus off the toys and tinsel and onto the Hope of Christmas.
I love to be still and quiet during this season.The candlelight service at our church is therapeutic for me. To stop and be still takes me back to the arms of Jesus. To be wrapped up in His love reminds me of what Christmas should be. I am reminded that I am not alone and that He is still with me.
I always try to focus on others during the year but especially at Christmas. I try to involve my children too. I want them to share God’s hope and love with the people who need it the most whether it be an elderly person at a nursing home, a family with no money to spend or even a homeless pet. All my children enjoy helping others. For a mom,that is a precious gift! This gift can’t be bought or wrapped.
I rarely remember what I got for Christmas, I do remember sleeping with my sister each Christmas Eve and my brother’s exquisitively wrapped presents. I remember the pitiful Christmas trees that we found in the woods and Mama allowing me to decorate the tree “all my myself”. They are gifts that never tarnish. For these memories I am thankful, gifts of gold and hope from God.
God Always Has A Way
by Genel Webb
I was sitting alone in my home office one day, not feeling motivated to do the menial, but important tasks at hand. I felt like I just wanted to talk to someone and pour my heart out. I needed a sounding board. I found myself saying, aloud — “Lord I feel as if I have no one to talk to, today.” Prior to being in a home office, I’d been in a corporate office sitting where I was able to fellowship with other Believers in the Lord everyday, even if it was in the break room or across the cubicle. Anyway, some other times when I’d made similar statements to the Lord, in my spirit, I would hear the Lord say — talk to me. This time, it just seemed as if the Lord was silent. I felt that a couple of people that I could have called, at that time of day, would be busy. And others that I thought of to call didn’t quite seem to be the right person. Well, as those words came out of my mouth, the phone rang immediately and I really mean immediately. It was one of my friends, one of my sisters in the Lord. She said, “I just called to see how you were and how things were going.” I said this is so unbelievable that you would call at this moment. I shared with her what had just come out of my mouth and a few other things that I just wanted to talk through. And I thought, “God always has a way….”
God always has a way of making provision for our needs. And because the word of God tells us that His ways are not like ours, we may not have thought of His way, but He always has a way. He never forsakes us or leaves us. He’s not a million miles away. He’s here, he’s there, and he’s everywhere. And if we are a born again Believer in and of Him, His spirit is in us. He is amazing! He always has a way!
To, Just Be
by Genel Webb
As we enter the month of November, noted for Thanksgiving, one of the things that I’m thankful for, are friends that allow me “to, just be.” Sometimes, we aren’t at our best. The inclination for some of us, in those instances, is to just keep to ourselves. I’ve learned, however, that sincere friends don’t really mind if you’re not at your best. If you just want to be silly, a sincere friend allows you to do that, without looking at you strangely. Sometimes, they get silly with you! If you just want to voice the litany of reasons that have crossed your mind as to why you can’t continue to pursue your dreams, a sincere friend listens but reminds you of all the reasons that you began and all the reasons that you still can. If you just want to have a sounding board and pour your heart out because of life’s current challenges, a sincere friend lets you and then they build you up with words of encouragement. And when they encounter you next, after one of these moments, they don’t treat you as if that is who you really are…a silly, doubtful person who is down. They treat you as if it was just a moment along life’s journey. Sincere friends allow you to have your “moments” and still treat you as a thoughtful, full of faith and vibrant (or whoever you really are) person, after the moment is over. They don’t hold those moments against you. So all the time, as everyday is a day of thanksgiving, I’m thankful for sincere friends who allow me “to, just be.”
The Wisdom of An Older Woman
by Genel Webb
In scripture, in the book of Titus, it tells us (paraphrased) that the older women should teach the younger women. There is always something that we can learn from older women, especially those that are Believers. When I was 18 and not a Believer, I met a woman, Naomi, who sowed into my life by mentoring me and then discipling me for years and years. We became close friends for the last years of her life. I was able to sow back into her life, in a different way as her health declined. She passed away last year, but I can still hear her now, “get your bible and go to scripture so and so…read it aloud.” And then she would expound on it. What was unique about her was that she would teach me in modern day parables. She taught me so many things. Initially, I did not always appreciate her input, but respected her enough to listen. Can I tell you that I often thought and sometimes tried to explain to her that things were different these days? And things were different, but coming from a woman who was spirit filled, they were the same.
Now I consider myself a bit of an older woman in the lives of some of my friends and acquaintances. What my older friend (and my grandmother) drilled into me for so many years, in word and in deed was to “always help someone else. If you can’t help them, don’t hurt them.” And praise God, it seems to come naturally for me to do that. So as the Lord leads, I do. I often think about the things that Naomi shared with me when I was in my 20s and 30s. Sometimes, it was her experiences as a child, her experience of coming to the Lord, her experiences in the Lord or just life’s experiences in general. There was always a life lesson in what she shared.
Many women can look back over their lives and consider the things that they could share with a woman ten years their junior. What do you wish that someone would have told you when you were ten years younger? Make a list and then ask the Lord to help you be sensitive as to who and when you should share with. And welcome believing, older and wiser women into your life. There is a wisdom that only they can provide.
Laying Ourselves Aside
by Genel Webb
A few years ago, I read something where the premise was the following (and I agree, by the way). One way to get to know or learn another person is to refuse to focus on ourselves and really listen to them and hear what they’re saying. This statement is not a revelation, but if we examine whether we actually do this or not, the result may be a revelation.
When we’re meeting someone for the first time, some of us are preoccupied with making a great impression, so we’re thinking mainly about what we are going to say to them, while they are talking to us. We’re thinking about how we are being perceived.
When we can lay aside ourselves or put the concern of ourselves aside, we can truly hear what the other person is saying, and the feelings behind what they are saying. We hear their minds, their hearts and spirit.
I’ve come to the conclusion that when I’m going to be with others in a group or one on one, there is often a need for me to pray and ask the Lord to help me to keep my focus on others and never on myself. It never fails to make for an interesting encounter. Personally, I’m interested in all people, and I believe that everyone has an interesting story. People discern whether we are listening and have a real interest in them and whatever they are sharing. I encourage us to try to not present ourselves in these types of encounters — and let the preeminent focus be to listen and hear what others are saying. We’ll learn and get to know people much better.
Play It Forward
by Nora Neal-Daggett
What impressed me most about Pat was that she was genuine, warm, honest, and open — the qualities that draw you in and pave the way for more conversation. I was hoping to snag a few days more at the beach. Todd, Marzetta and the girls were coming down to pick me up and drive me to meet Tim and Rachael. I thought it would be so nice if we could spend a few days together at the beach…make a new memory.
She seemed interested and sympathetic as I explained that my husband had died less than a year ago. She asked how…you seem so young. I explained…and we unbeknown to us began a “ heart-to-heart” relationship.
While leafing through a very large ledger as she listened, she would make eye contact. (They were not computerized at this rental agency. In my opinion, technology has taken away the “human touch”. People are so into the screen that there is no eye contact!) So, this just added to the southern charm and sealed a place in my heart for her.
We chatted as she perused the cottages that were available. She told me she had been a school teacher, now retired and that her family had owned the business for over 30 years. She and her husband preferred to carry on the office in the “traditional way”. “It worked for my parents, and it works for us,” she said. She told me that her husband was very involved in local governmental affairs. Her husband worked with others to maintain Holden Beach as a family oriented vacation spot while she and her staff ran the office.
We found the perfect place “Martian’s Roost” for the kids and I to spend a few days. As we completed the rental agreement, I decided that Holden Beach Properties would have my business from now on.
Fast-forward three years. It is mid week of my vacation with my girlfriend of 30 years. It is time to reserve our cottage for next year. I’m excited to see Pat and the girls at the rental office. I run up the wooden stairs, open the door, hear the warm familiar ring of the bell announcing my presence and Pat walked out with the same genuine warm smile and greeted me by saying; “Well, if it isn’t my friend Nora Daggett!”
I begin by telling her how wonderful our cottage by he sea is and how marvelously awesome God is to allow me one more year at Holden. I give the pot-a-note version of the past year, my book, and my new relationship. I notice her eyes were kind, as always. But, there was also a hint of sadness, I thought to myself. She listened to me and then said, “So there is joy on the other side, I lost David this year.”
I stopped in mid-sentence. Time stood still as I wrapped my mind around her words. I moved towards her and asked her if I could hug her and before she could answer my arms were pulling her toward me and I began to pray. “Lord, God, hold her tender fragmented heart in your hands and heal it. Hold her close Lord and give her peace. You promise in your word, Lord, that you will carry us through sorrow and over the bumpy roads of mourning and we claim that right now, In the name of Jesus!”
I held her for a few more seconds…heart touching heart…strength touching weakness.
I knew in that moment that God’s promise in Isaiah 61:4 was true. I was “a mighty oak of righteousness, planted for the Lords glory!” I held this verse close to my heart as I walked the road from mourning to joy. Now I was playing it forward.
Scripture: Isaiah 61: 3-4. He will comfort all who mourn in Zion, To give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness: They will be called mighty oaks of righteousness, The planting of the Lord, that He maybe glorified.
Prayer: Thank you Lord, for using me to demonstrate that there is joy after deep sorrow. I have traveled the roads of sorrow simply by leaning, trusting and depending on you. I reached out to someone whose pain I could see and feel. Praise God, that YOU used me to touch and impart the promise that joy does come…later. God, you are awesome and your word is true. THANK YOU FOR ALLOWING ME TO BE A LIVING TESTIMONY! In JESUS NAME, Amen.
Angels In The Flesh
by Genel Webb
I have found that sometimes a friend shows up to events in your life when you just need them to be in the same space as you, not because you called, but because there seemed to be a knowing that their presence would make a difference. Even though there may be many other people there — just knowing that they are there and that they want the best for you in that situation, strengthens you. Some call it moral support. I’ve come to describe it as God sent angels in the flesh.
I recently experienced a situation where I had to be the picture of confidence. I wanted everything to go right. I always tell myself that with prayer and preparation, everything will go fine. So I prayed and did everything that I thought needed to be done according to the plan, however something felt undone. Or was it just because I’m used to being busy and there didn’t seem to be anything else to be busy about. Anyway a friend dropped in to see how everything was going. She immediately commented that from her perspective, everything looked great, except one area. In addition, she came up with possible solutions and offered herself to make sure that it got done. It involved us purchasing some wood products, lifting the wood, hammering nails, and taking her van to pick up the material…all while she was caring for her grandchildren that day. She spent three to four hours with me addressing this issue. She would not accept monetary compensation. She asked me, “can you accept this as a friend?” Although we are friends, I just felt this went so much beyond. As I stood there kind of speechless, she then said, “l understand that you have a problem receiving, but please accept what I’m doing as a friend.” The “problem receiving” rang a bit true and is a another story.
After all our hard work, she attended the event in the middle of other commitments. I felt blessed and strengthened by her presence. I felt that of all the people that were there, she truly understood how important her presence was to me. I felt that she was an angel sent by the Lord and He had also allowed another layer of our friendship to develop. She had toiled with me, a couple of days before…before everything was ideal. There we had been hammering nails, sweating, eating crackers and drinking soda. Yet she walked into the event looking as professional as ever. I had the opportunity to greet her as she walked in the door but we did not have an opportunity to talk much more during the event. However, knowing that she was there as a person who was truly for me and desired the best for me, strengthened me. I know that all strength comes from the Lord, yet He often uses people. In this instance, I believe that He sent a type of angel in the flesh, in the form of a friend.
Psalm 91:11 For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways…
Beware the Dangers of Isolation
by Maria Simone
I recently read a newspaper article that shook me to the core. It reported the story of horrible abuse by a mother toward her 6 adopted children, which went completely unnoticed until the youngest, a 4 year old boy, was found dead at her hands. What struck me about this family’s situation was how isolated they were from the rest of society - they lived in a farm house many miles from town, the mother home schooled her children (please don’t take this the wrong way all you home schoolers out there), and they attended a very small church (about 20 people), where the pastor taught them to avoid all contact with the world, and to abuse their children in order to get them to behave.
Would this situation have continued, or even escalated to the point that it did, if this family were more connected to other people? Isolation is one of the major tools Satan uses to keep people in deception, and it is in direct contrast to what God tells us to do. Ecclesiastes 4: 9-10, 12 (Message) says “It’s better to have a partner than go it alone. Share the work, share the wealth. And if one falls down, the other helps, but if there is no one to help, tough!.…By yourself you’re unprotected. With a friend you can face the worst.” The enemy wants to get us alone so he can have our undivided attention, with no one to show us the truth. Sometimes it takes a friend to wake us up and stop us from going down a dangerous road.
The Lord clearly warns us in Hebrews 10:25 (NLT), “And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.” There are countless examples in the Bible where God tells us to encourage, comfort and pray for each other. And Jesus said “Go forth and make disciples of all the nations”. All of these commands require venturing out of ourselves and reaching out to others. God made us for relationship, not isolation. So next time you’re struggling with something, don’t let fear keep you from reaching out for help. Remember, “By yourself, you’re unprotected. With a friend you can face the worst.”
Best Friends at Home
by Beverly Mueffelmann
When our children were very young, my husband’s aunt, uncle, and cousins came to visit our home outside Washington, DC. My husband’s cousins, an older sister and a younger brother, are significantly younger than he, so these children were in their teens at the time when we were in our late twenties. As we visited, we were very impressed with the fact that there seemed to be none of the standard sibling issues between them. In fact, they seemed to be very good friends despite being teenaged siblings of opposite gender and having just made a cross-country trip from Colorado in an unairconditioned car in the summer!
After marveling at their behavior toward one another, my husband asked his aunt how they had managed to raise their children to love and appreciate each other in this way. Her response, though unusual and somewhat morbid, was that they had told their children that they had better learn to be best friends, because when their parents died, they would be all each other had! We were a little taken aback at first, but when we saw the fruit of their words, we were sold!
Obviously, making this statement doesn’t automatically make siblings the best of friends, but following the statement with practical applications of “what it looks like” can make a difference. In reality, I believe that sibling rivalry exists only if parents allow it. If siblings feel the need to compete with one another or to treat one another unkindly, it is because there is a felt need to be met by it, either the need for parental attention or the need for raising self-esteem at the expense of another. Identifying the need and taking the appropriate steps to meet the need will usually correct the misbehavior.
So, what does it “look like”? If your children are saying unkind things to one another, instead of letting it slide by, say “In our house, we choose to encourage one another with our words. That doesn’t sound like you are encouraging your sister. Are you being encouraging or discouraging? How could you say it differently?” (The catch in this approach is that you better be careful that your own words to your husband and children are encouraging as well, or you might hear these same phrases directed back at you!) Instilling a sense of cooperation between your children is also helpful. Give your children tasks they must do together in order to succeed and praise them at each step with, “Wow! Look at how cooperation gets the job done so much faster. I’m really proud of both of you!” I bet your children will be asking you for jobs that they can do together if these are the words that they hear from you.
Basically, children look to belong, to learn, and to contribute in their families and when any of these qualities are missing in their experience, you can expect poor behavior and communication as a result. If you value each of your children for who they are as individuals, if you encourage them each in their giftings without comparing them to one another, and if you give them equal opportunities to learn and to contribute to your family, then I believe that you will have the ingredients for creating best friends at home.
Let Us Be Encouragers
by Genel Webb
“Let us be encouragers one to another,” as my grandmother used to say. Each day as we encounter people that we know and people that we don’t know, we can all be encouragers. It costs us nothing, yet it so increases the other person that receives the encouragement and the person that gives it. It doesn’t matter how successful a person is or isn’t, the effects of being encouraged are the same. It makes the receiver of the encouragement feel stronger and just better. As Believers in the Lord, Jesus Christ, encouragement is a wonderful seed to sow. What person that is struggling to make ends meet, doesn’t want to hear — you can make it…keep plowing? What former addict doesn’t want to hear — keep going, keep looking forward? What great chef doesn’t want to hear that the meal was delicious, or what anointed musician doesn’t want to hear that someone was moved by their music or what great athlete doesn’t want to hear that their playing was extraordinary? And whose spirit doesn’t it bring a smile to…to feel that because of your sincere encouraging words, someone is strengthened?
My point is that all involved parties benefit from encouragement, the encourager and the person being encouraged. I’m sure that this is not a revelation to anyone reading this because we can all bear witness to the effects of encouragement. All of us have been on both sides. It’s so simple and easy. “Let us continue to be encouragers, one to another.”
Community
by Susan Lucas
I recently got back from a beach vacation to a small island off the coast of North Carolina. I usually just get to go for a few days at a time but this time I managed to stay two weeks. What I have found in this small community is a group of people who regularly fellowship with each other. We were welcomed into homes, offered meals, rides when our golf cart broke down and friendship. Having established the majority of my close friends before moving to Raleigh I was overwhelmed with hospitality these past 2 weeks. These people wanted nothing in return. They just wanted to spend time with me and my family. What an incredible blessing it was!
For me, my love language is time. Just ask my husband who gave me a very expensive watch and I asked him “Why on earth would he spend so much money?” Trust me that wasn’t a wise response on my end. I just value people more than things and I have to admit I get tired of relationships that seem to only want something from me and that don’t value me as a person. Consumerism in America affects our friendships too and it makes me terribly sad.
Somehow I feel we are so blessed in America that we have neglected what really matters…the gift of yourself unconditionally. As Christians we should be leading the way. The people who led the way for me during my vacation weren’t even regular church attenders.
Offering up our lives to others is just what Jesus would want us to do and I don’t believe all or even most of it needs to happen within the church walls. In a country of prosperity we remain lonely as individuals. As a reflection of Christ I find that reprehensible. Most of us just seem too busy to care.
I want to become “missional” in my community. Whether that means attending a neighborhood party, answering an e-mail, writing a thank you note or attending a baseball game played in by a friend’s son. I want to show that I authentically care. Talk to me is cheap. I want action. I want people to wonder what makes me different and then I want to share the answer—Jesus! I want to “shine like a star in a dark world.”
“If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if His love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care—then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don’t push your way to the front; Don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don’t get obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand.” Phillipians 2:1-3, The Message.